I thought it would be at least 10 more years before having to pen a blog post about my body. Nope, it’s happening, right now as I type.
Of late, my body has been conflicted, torn, even confused at certain times. It seems to be having trouble with whether it wants to progress or regress. Let me first start by saying I’m not one of those women who dread growing old. I absolutely look forward to everything aging brings me, and have hope that I can age gracefully and beautifully, even avoiding some of the traditional assumptions about seasoned women. I’ve always said, “When I grow up I want to grow old”. I want to live as many LONG years as God would allow and I look forward to the days decades and decades from now of being able to look back on days like today. With that said, my body has seemed to enter a light-weight war within itself. It can’t seem to make up its mind.
While driving on the interstate behind a stinky, big rig I reached in my purse to make sure I had my inhaler, and glanced at my little medicine pouch making sure it too was in tact. Then I thought. Here I am at 42 (in a few days) and battling with asthma which I never had as a child, using witch hazel to fight acne which I never really had as a child, sneezing like I’m in a pepper mill because of allergies which I use to have as a child, wearing arch supports for an achy ankle that I sprain as a child, in need of more naps than I likely did as a child, all while still feeling and looking like a grown woman who takes potassium for stronger bones, eats oatmeal because she needs more fiber, sees little “fine lines” when she looks in a mirror, supports Spanx and other support agents because they support her, keeps muscle rub in the house just in case some body part starts telling the story of all its been through and let’s the grey hairs just stay there.
So here I am at sort of an internal juxtaposition, with my body rekindling its relationship with some matters from my past, and still forging ahead with signs that I’m headed toward a future and, as always, all I can do is laugh. I’m just grateful that I’m alive to see and feel it all.