And Just Like That, I Saw an Ex

Before I continue typing let me say off the top that this post is like a tree-less street in the heat of a HOT August day…It’s 100% Shade Free. That means no ill, harm, cynicism or sarcasm are implied or intended so if that’s what you were hoping I’m sorry to disappoint.


I had the privilege to be given two premium tickets to see Jill Scott perform in my hometown of Birmingham, AL. Only befitting, I asked my bestie since 1977 to join me. We linked up with my sister/friend from College and her friend, who is now my friend, to eat a tasty bite at Cantina Laredo in Birmingham’s Uptown district. We enjoyed the food and conversation about men, education, and life. We laughed as we walked to the BJCC Legacy Arena. While making the trek to the concert, I confessed that my knee was still hurting from the late-night line dancing the night before so I walked very gingerly. We watched my bestie strut, trying not to look like her feet hurt in her Christian Louboutins, because baby, she was rocking those red bottoms like nobody’s business! We made it to the Concert Hall entrance, still chatting it up and just like that I saw an ex!


I don’t know what I expected to feel upon seeing this person, but I felt a sense of relief and internal joy when our eyes briefly met as he nodded his must-be-still-used-often head nod and I presented my southern born and bred smile of congeniality. We made it through the ticket gates around the same time then, low and behold ended up sitting across from each other the entire show. God has a sense of humor:)

As I’m driving home I could barely stop smiling. I was stuck on, and amused by the fact that I know without a shadow of a doubt that the Lord will show you your past to prepare you for the not too distant future, and He’ll show you that those with you are ready to go with you. In the words of Jilly from Philly, I’m getting “Prepared”.

I smiled on the inside through the laughter that was bursting out in spurts on the outside because I was reminded that yes, ma’am, yes, sir, I am 100% healed of the pains of that relationship regarding things of the past and unfinished business which lingers. I knew I was over that, but sometimes it’s nice to be reminded of the victory one more time, live and in person. What was REALLY awesome, however, is the revelation that my crew is pretty darn cool, and they too had joined me on the path to “I’m So Over It Land”! The cast of characters which just so happened to have had a ringside seat at last night’s side show (as in my ex was sitting just off to my side) truly showed me that they too are ready for my future. There could not have been any more feisty people with me or around me at that concert (with the exception of my dear, sweet “don’t play about her sister” sister), and they all handled the evening like a Lady:)

Even though their pictures are clearly posted, for the sake of inside secrets the names you are about to read have been changed…LOL! Carry on…


My Bestie, Annette made a few jokes while explaining the “situation” to the couple sitting next to us, but as my self-appointed body guard since kindergarten the fact that she didn’t cut clear across the aisle and offer a piece of her mind for old times sake made me proud. My sister/friend Bell hugged him, then sent text messages to me throughout the show making sure all was well. My sister/friend Mel was sitting just down from my ex and while we posed for pictures she didn’t mumble a mumbling word. (And she can mumble some words.) My sister/friend Nicky sent a message to me not saying what she really wanted to say, and she stayed seated. For her, that’s a major triumph.


That concert reminded me that sometimes in life we focus on our own personal healing of pains from the past, not knowing that those who do life with us hurt when we do. To me, it makes no sense to overcome if those around us can’t come along for the new, the now and the next with us. When we can ALL get together under one roof to the hilarious and inspiring, soul-stirring, lyrics of the incomparable Jill Scott and be alright…fabulous is more like it, then we are ready. When we ALL know and show that God has done something truly amazing within us and prove it by seeing what once caused pain, laugh about it and not even dwell on the things of old (or dissect those things which might be new) that’s when you know that you know that you know that you ALL are ready for NEXT!!! In the words of Archie Eversole featuring Bubba Sparxxx, “We Ready!”



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