Originally written in 2003, I was tickled to see this post this morning following the message Pastor Chris preached at Church of the Highlands on Sunday, Marcy 6th.
Crisis is bound to come whenever two or more people of different backgrounds, experiences and opinions come together. That’s especially so in relationships like marriage, family, social media and social settings and work environments. So how do you overcome crisis?
Apply the 5 Cs
Christ-Christ is, and always should be the center of everything you think, say and do. Before you proceed in handling a crisis consult Christ via prayer and His Word to see what He has to say about the matter. Acknowledge the Lord and He will guide you through this time of crisis (Proverbs 3:6)
Communication-Once you’ve sought the Lord, communicate your matters of the heart with those involved. Bottling in your feelings is not a solution. Be sure, though, to communicate lovingly, selflessly, compassionately and spiritually. Make your words as pleasant as a honeycomb. Also, pray to the Lord that He allow you to communicate at the right time. Someone once said that the right thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing. (Proverbs 16:24)
Counseling-The Lord places some people in our lives for the purpose of helping us overcome areas in which He has already delivered them. Seek out those persons. Whether it be a Minister, brother or sister in Christ or someone who has shared similar experiences, there is someone for everyone. When seeking Godly counsel, do know that the counsel will not always be comfortable. It may hurt and you may not want to hear it. Recognize that true Godly counsel does not always validate what you feel or think is true. In issues of relationships, it might cause you to see that the other person is not as much to blame as you would like to believe. Remember the way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise. (Proverbs 12:15)
Conviction- Allow the Lord to work on your heart to convict you toward His will for the relationship. Should you apologize? Are there some areas in your life that you have to die to? Are there outside influences that may be clouding your judgment? Spiritual conviction is not always pleasant. Just like being arrested for a crime. It’s painful. Prayerfully though, after your “arrest” you’re a better person, not willing to commit the same sins which placed you in the predicament. When you’re convicted by Christ regarding your relationship it may hurt, but it helps. Some parts of you will be challenged, but what the Lord evolves you into will be what God desires for the relationship. It will also equip you with tools to help weather other situations. (Romans 12:2)
Conversion-Conviction leaves room for conversion. A change must come. In order for you to completely weather the crisis in your relationship, someone or something has to change. It may be one of you. It may be both of you. Conversion does not equal guilt. It does not mean a green light for one spouse to criticize or point the finger at the other. It means that one or both persons was willing to allow the Lord to move in the relationship via Christ, Communication, Counseling and Conviction. Conversion means forgiving and forgetting what was and looking for what is to be. (2 Corinthians 5:17)