Life is Unfair…and It’s Supposed to Be

Life is unfair. There. I said it. It’s life. It’s supposed to be that way so that God’s purpose and design for all the ways He chooses to show Himself strong and MIGHTY can come forth regardless of what’s unfair.

Two almost automatic components to the things in life which are not fair are complaining and blaming. Listen, I’m not casting stone or throwing shade at anyone who still relishes in the blame/complain game. I can tell you a thing or two about both, as I’ve had my fair share of unfair and, if given the human (not spiritual) green light, can lay blame like a skilled woodsman and can complain like nobody’s business. But why? What good does blaming and complaining do? What problem do they solve? I even had to ask, in my biggest, most dramatic fits of blame/complain fancy, who am I really upset with? Was it the man, woman, child, job, decision, lost dream or failed hope which angered, saddened, or defeated me or was I really, deep down inside upset with God for His plans not being my plans, as if He didn’t already tell me it was be so and as if I didn’t know that He knew what He was doing based on ALL He’d already done. He knows what He’s doing and He knows what we must go through in order to appreciate it all the more.

There’s a destructive danger in blaming and complaining that the frustration or hurt we experience during that time often blocks us from seeing. We don’t know the unfortunate seeds our blaming and complaining words sow and sprout when we least expect it. We can see it in our children who take on the same unhealthy mindset. We can see it in our lives when things line up the way God intended them to and we can recognize it because blaming and complaining have jaded our view. We can see it through the mental, physical, emotional and spiritual toll blaming and complaining takes on us (and our loved ones). We can see it in lack of peace in our lives. We can see it in not seeing what we were meant to see or have because we’ve become bitter and not ready to receive. There are so many ways our words, through blaming and complaining, can cause effects we don’t desire or deserve.

There’s good news in life and with things unfair. God is THERE…

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@AngelaMMoore316

Sickness Stinks, but Healing is SWEET

I type this blog post from the beautiful Disneyland Resort in Anaheim, California. This unexpected, perfectly timed, all-expenses paid trip to celebrate the professional success of a loved one has been nothing short of amazing. It truly has been inspiring, eye-opening, refreshing, filled with gratitude and FUN all in one!!!! I’m truly grateful to be here as a guest.
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The six+ hours to get here from Birmingham, with a running through the Houston airport “layover” which only lasted about 20 minutes and a delicious turkey and fig with cream cheese sandwich on the United flight was memorable to say the least. The high elevation on the flight to Cali was also a reminder that I have Lymphedema, but God is still good.
Any person with Lymphedema knows that we should wear our garments on flights because of the change in air pressure. Well, since I haven’t worn a sleeve or glove in a couple of years, I forgot to put one on pre-flight. As the plane rose, I could feel my arm’s lymphatic fluid doing the same. I panicked! My mind immediately went back to the big, fat hurting (and expensive) arm I’d dealt with for years, thinking that my trip to “the greatest place on earth” would be marred by pain. Well, it wasn’t and it isn’t. I massaged my arm, as I’ve been accustomed to doing since my diagnosis in 2011. I didn’t lay on it while sleeping. I shook my hand when feeling it become full and I MOVED ON! God is good. There were days, not too long ago, where this would not have happened. But God is good! He’s a healer on His on terms, in His own time and in His on way. Now, will I immediately get a soft- tissue massage when I get back home to make sure all which is well stays well with my lymphatic system?. Yes! But will I declare without reservation that by His stripes we are healed? YES!
For all who are going through matters regarding health, be it physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional, whether it’s yours to carry or pertaining to someone for which you care, just know that HEALING is in the house! You must believe that! For God’s children sickness can not show up without healing chasing it down and run it over at its heels.
We have to do our part in the Lord’s plans toward our healing. That means seeing a doctor, seeking therapy and staying with it, taking medications, changing our habits, getting rid of fear, revising our routines, and first and foremost knowing what the Bible says about healing, reading it, praying it, rehearsing it and looking for it. Have faith, my friends and hold to it tightly. Then be prepared to celebrate and share what He’s done as you see healing in action through epic displays. #Matthew813
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@AngelaMMoore316

She Said That…Again

Facebook’s handy feature called “On This Day” is such a treat. It allows you to look back in reflection of things posted on this day. I enjoy seeing old pictures, seeing what I was praying for, reading what was on my mind, seeing who I connected with as FB friends and getting an overall glimpse of who or what was occupying my mind on this day.

On this day, April 12th, the following is what I had to say, with perhaps the most profound being my Waffle House wish:0

Angela Scott Moore

I was up this morning considering some pending things I need The Lord to do for me soon and with favorable certainty.
My quite time was interrupted by loud sounds of chirping and quacking. I looked outside in the front and backyard to see several different birds, ducks and geese having Sunday breakfast compliments of whatever my ground was providing.
It hit me. God will not allow others (birds, ducks, and geese) to dine off of what’s mine without making sure I’m able to feast as abundantly off of what’s His.
That’s good news!
The moral of this message: God’s got this, that, them, you and me too!!!! ‪#‎pleasebelieve

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Angela Scott Moore added a new photo.
April 12, 2014 at 10:20am ·

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Angela Scott Moore's photo.
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Angela Scott Moore
April 12, 2013 at 5:32am ·

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Hello TODAY! I’ve been waiting on you:)

Angela Scott Moore's photo.
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Angela Scott Moore
April 12, 2012 at 3:56pm ·

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I wish Waffle House delivered!

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Angela Scott Moore
April 12, 2012 at 9:07am ·

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Butterflies and buzzards don’t fly together and that’s fine. Both have a purpose, one is just prettier.-Angela Moore

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Angela Scott Moore
April 12, 2011 at 7:28pm ·

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Stop looking like where you are unless you plan on staying there.-Angela Moore #biggergreaterbetter

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Angela Scott Moore
April 12, 2011 at 9:09am ·

I’m connected to so many blessed men & women! Monday we shouted & “shook bangles” for LaTanya Jones Moore!!!! Today we’re celebrating with Dru Harris Ealons!!! “Who got next?!?!?!” Is it you???? I don’t mind bringing up the rear:) #andthepartydontstop

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Angela Scott Moore

So MANY great things are happening in the lives of those I love. Even in the midst of their adversity God is still showing Who’s the Man! I’m so excited and so expectant about what is to come. I don’t mind celebrating your victory like it’s my own!!! #havepraisewillPARTY

@AngelaMMoore316

Oh, Girl…Your Problem is Showing

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An unexpected visit by a co-worker who doesn’t normally swing into my space revealed that I was off my game. She stopped by in the midst of her busy schedule to ask me if I was okay. I responded with the standard response of, “I’m okay.” She then said, “You don’t look like it. I was watching you and noticed that you weren’t smiling like you normally do. Are you telling me the truth? What’s the matter? ” I then began to recall in one big breath my last several months telling her that I had/still have a lot going on including an ill father, having packed one house while frantically looking for another house, unpacking the new rental home, dealing with some pressing personal/business matters which were weighing on me, battling fatigue because of all I just mentioned and trying to balance it all in the midst of working two jobs. She then responded, as a good sounding board would, “I knew something wasn’t right because you simply weren’t yourself. I’m so sorry. I will be praying and expecting to see the Angela I know back soon.” And just like that she left. She didn’t ask any specifics. She didn’t pity me. She didn’t dig for dirt. She didn’t offer her two cents. She offered prayer and expectation, and a genteel reminder that it was time I stepped up my game.

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And just like that I realized that my secret was out. I thought I was handling my business business as usual and clearly wasn’t. Not that I didn’t expect to have problems. I’m actually accustomed to them by now, and the blessings which always follow. But I thought I’d reached a point in my spiritual and natural progression where my problems didn’t show. I was wrong. My problem was showing and I didn’t know it. Sometimes, as good as we think we may be in covering those things we’re working through we are still human and subject to the external display of internal situations. That could be shown through our attitudes, actions, enthusiasm, and responses to things which ordinarily wouldn’t bother us and any other myriad of ways troubles tend to affect even the best of us.

Having pondered what my colleague said, I was grateful for her asking what was wrong, not assuming my situation and definitely not ignoring my warning signs. It made me realize others care, even those I don’t interact with daily. It made me feel relieved to be able to share with someone who was genuine. It made me glad that she noticed so that I could put my emotions on notice that Jesus and I would be handling them from here on out. And it made me glad that someone sincere, and not concerned with how what I was going through might or might not be affecting them noticed so that I could get myself together as to not let my issues interfere with other things or show up with other people. God forbid my “goings on”, even as they’re being worked on, leak out into my treasured relationships with my loved ones or valuable interactions with those I supervise or associate with regularly. That would be a tragedy and I don’t prefer tragedy.

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@AngelaMichele316

Don’t Ditch Your Dreams

Life Gets Better

Hey You,

Don’t ditch your dreams! Why? Because if it were over it would be, well…over. And it ain’t.
(I did say “ain’t”)

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So go ahead, and WAKE UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!! (in my best possible Laurence Fishburne’s “Dap” voice from School Daze). Pick yourself back up. Dare to innovate. Be done with fear. Tune out the haters. Put off procrastinating. Prepare to hustle. Accept the challenge. Go back to the drawing board, vision board or board room. Speak your dreams like they’re already alive. Look the part like you already live it. Be bold enough to hope. Find some mentors. Save some money. Set aside time. Set your sites on some pertinent scriptures. Have faith and work it, chile. Practice your victory dance and plan your celebration party. Instead of throwing in the towel use it to dust yourself off, get back on the saddle, round up your posse and ride this thing called life on out to see…

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The Breakup: I Have So Much To Say

An al.com article about Alabama’s former first lady Dianne Bentley sparked some recent and old feelings about what to do and what to say after the breakup. Thankfully, many of have not experienced the ultimate breakup granted by the lingering pains and/or effects of divorce. Chile, be glad about it. But I would think that most have experienced a breakup one way or the other whether it be with a mate, with a job or from an organization and have been faced with the question of what to say, how much to say and to whom.

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The article noted so eloquentely how Mrs. Bentley has been just that, eloquent, in this whole sordid process being publicly played out in the press and the privacy of our own homes, memes and phones. What an example of class, poise and trust in God! I needed her as a fresh and real reminder right now to stay the course of silence. For those of you who know me you must know that I love to talk. It’s what I do. So to have a virtual muzzle on my mouth regarding things which are personal, painful, and sometimes public whether I want them to be or not, and not be able to truly and fully speak on it from my point of view offering unshared truths has truly been a lesson learned with some repeated classes. Now, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely believe in the power of wise counsel and know that to carry the weight of any breakup on my back alone would be more detrimental than I could bare. So there are those who know what the real deal is because I can trust them to handle it, stay hushed up, not rile me up into a state of tomfoolery and not hinder the plans God obviously has in place with no need of a running mouth ruining it. However, I recognize through trial and error that:

  • Everyone can’t handle my story of what happened before, during and after the breakup. That means it would be foolish of me to share with the world why what happened has affected my current living options and way of life, or why it took six years for my house to sell, or why I didn’t make the move to divorce first, or whether I knew divorce was coming or not, or why I didn’t allude to others of any problems prior to the divorce, or why I didn’t go back when my former spouse felt he wanted me to, or why I am still friends with some people from our former shared circle, or why some from our former shared circle are no longer friends with me (there is a difference in those two things I just said), or what the divorce decree really said, or what really happened with what was decreed and supposed to be done, or why I won’t entertain or engage negative comments regarding my past or my former spouse, or why my response is usually “Just pray”, and so on and so on and so on.  You may hear it but not from me.
  • Everyone shouldn’t know my story until it’s sealed and wrapped in a pretty little God-blessed bow. I realize that some simply can’t handle the truth. I can barely handle it and it happens to me.  I feel the same as I hear of the hurts which happen to those I love, immediately wanting to “fix it” sometimes not through the best of means and especially because it’s not my bees-wax. To share it out of angst or “I’ll get even”, or prematurely without God’s ultimate desires of healing, restoration (according to His design not our definition) and progress taking place would do His plans, even through a breakup, a total disservice. I need God TOO MUCH to do Him a disservice any more than I already have in my 44 years of life.
  • People are going to believe what they want or need to believe. I see now that some people have to condition themselves to see, believe or accept what they feel they need to in order to keep them in the place of comfort or convenience for where they feel they need to be (and for what reasons). That’s cool. However, to take the position of defense in honor of those things I know to be true because I lived it, and try to explain, vindicate, mitigate or simply be messy does nothing but create more mess. Breakups are a mess with no help needed.

So, whether through divorce, the end of a dating relationship, separation from a job/church/organization or any breach of association, SILENCE, that difficult, unfair, trying, yet necessary stance is the way to go. It really does serve its purpose when it’s allowed to, uninterrupted. #silence

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@AngelaMMoore316

Divorce 101: Look Ahead, Honey

Divorce has a dastardly way of trying to cause you to keep looking back and around, rather than forward.

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torn piece of paper with divorce text and paper couple figures

Some look back wondering why. Others look back questioning what if. Many look back full of regrets. While some get consumed with looking at what’s going on around wondering what the “ex” is doing, how well he or she is doing, waiting on their demise, being concerned with what people are thinking or caught up with what people are saying.

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Words from the Wise: Look ahead, honey. Be so unshakably focused on what’s ahead that you can’t be bothered with who or what is behind or around. Set your sights firmly on the newness awaiting and like a good HBCU marching band hurrying into formation just before the “break it all the way down” interlude or a perfectly perfected military regime know that FORWARD is the order of the day. #lookahead #marchon

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@AngelaMMoore316