I’m sorry. I apologize from the depths of my ever-evolving soul for my often utter abandonment of you. I apologize for all the times I entertained wistful thoughts of desired delight wishing you were tomorrow, or neglected you for pity-filled thoughts of yesterday. I’m sorry for sucking my corrected teeth and pouting my already ample lips at the sun bursting forth releasing the sight of you on a Monday, a dreaded day or any day where I haven’t been grateful for you. I want to say “my bad” for talking badly about you to loved ones, as if you weren’t right there with me, all along, being there for me as you’ve always been. I offer my heartfelt apologies for being with you then cheating on you by simultaneously being entangled with fear, anxiety, or anticipation.
Dear, sweet today, I want you to know that it’s not you. It’s never been you. You are enough. You are the beautiful blessing you’ve always been. It’s been me. I know that, accept that and am working to correct that. Be patient with me, and hang in there with me, please. I know now that you are all I have. You are here for me and I wouldn’t have it any other way. For that I am grateful and more determined than ever to let you simply be…for me.
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